a load of balls

bertram thought his golfing skills
a cut above the rest -
last thursday he teed up and swung
like rambo in his vest

but what he struck had other plans
and curved off to the right -
last glimpse he got was just before it 
left his field of sight

blamed his club, of course he did,
and hurled it at his caddy -
luckily it missed and caught the
left ear of the baddie

(by whom I mean opponent, see,
a better player far) -
let's say that made our bertram's task
less tricky than before

bunker full of sand, poor chap,
a handy resting place -
let's cut to bertie on the green,
large grin upon his face

bereft of competition, now,
a burden off his back -
lets him pull and slice all day, yet
lead the chasing pack

but putting pleased him most because
a hundred hits still won -
losing games was so last year,
lost self-esteem so done

back in the clubhouse how he crowed
and boasted of his win -
last I heard they'd blackballed bert for
lapsing into sin

bad enough to off a bloke
and worse that he's a member -
look, worst of all, to claim a win after completely
losing count of a score you really can't quite remember

be this tale an awful warning,
always follow every rule
lest you're shunned by decent people -
little's worse than look a fool

image: GOLF.com

inspiration: ball from


15 thoughts on “a load of balls

  1. Well, David, it looks like you have mastered balls 101 and get the ‘having balls trophy.’ As for the “always follow every rule” rule, my rule is follow rules that make sense. If they don’t, ignore, oppose or follow depending on the circumstances. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

      1. 101 is a way we designated college courses, Dave. There would be things like Philosophy 1, Philosophy 101, etc. You had definitely moved beyond Balls 1. πŸ™‚
        I’m not in the least surprised that you share my thoughts on rules…

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.